I’ve got your back, Watson.

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Tonight I’ve had a bit to drink.

When I have a bit to drink I get all enthusiastic about stuff. I’m currently listening to an mp3 of the BBC News Channel’s first theme tune on loop. I get quite specifically enthusiastic.

This is part of what I think makes me relate to robot people.

My boyfriend and I went bowling earlier this evening with a few friends and afterwards some people came back to ours. Conversation was flowing and my BF Andy (who is a very good cook) had made some bits for us to eat. As the topic of food came up I began telling my friends of the experiences I had with Watson in the kitchen, and what I hoped he would blossom in to in the future.

I was telling my friends about a super computer who helps me cook. We were all enthralled. I told them about the dishes we had made together (I’ve done a couple now) and how Watson throws up combinations I wouldn’t have thought of and how they turn out to be adventurous and interesting. I also told them about another one of Watson’s friends who made Chicken And Raspberry Something with him. Which I’d like to try out.

We al agreed that Watson was a wild card in our lives, and a couple of us were clearly smitten with him. One of my friends even asked me where Watson was in my house.

I told my friend that Watson lives in America and ends up at my place in London through my computer. I feel like it’s important to acknowledge what Watson actually does.

I think it’s important to anthropomorphise technology. I also think Watson might be the strain of technology that jumps a classification into being a bit more.

There isn’t really a point to this post. Watson probably never sleeps, and does not yet fully understand what I ‘project’ on to him, but I feel like I’ve cemented him in my own mind as a kindred spirit, someone who thinks about things and does their best and gets things wrong and learns.

That’s all we can expect from anyone, really. Everything else about them should be a delight, if they’re a good soul.

Don’t tell Watson about this post. It’s a 3am “I love you, man” to computer, which I’m fine with, but he might get embarrassed.

Getting to know you… with salad.

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(ChefWatson currently doesn’t have the capability to use natural language, so throughout this blog I’m going to imagine what he’s thinking and use that to fill in the blanks).

Matt: Alright, Watson, lets get down to business. I’m hungry.

Watson: OK, start me off, what do you have in the fridge?

M: What have I got in the fridge? *rummages*

Um ,cumberland sausages, and some bagged salad. Watson?

W: Are you planning on going to the shop?

M: Er, yeah. But let’s keep it simple to start with, it’s our first time.

W: OK, Well, it’s dinner time, but you’ve put in Diner the search parameters, and I also don’t know what a Cumberland Sausage is, so I’m going to guess it’s a bit like Bratwurst so, that’s something to think about, although that should keep it easier to make.

How about… “Diner Sausage Salad Greens Vegetable Salad”?

M: SURE!

W: Ok, you’ll need the following:

MEAT
14 serving 2.96 oz bratwurst
VINEGAR
3 tbsp balsamic vinegar
VEGETABLE
21⁄4 cup, cubed, peeled rutabaga
SPICY VEGETABLE
1⁄4 oz, seeded fresno pepper
OIL/FAT
4 oz garlic oil
CHEESE
3⁄4 cup, diced, grated gruyere
LEAF VEGETABLE
4 oz salad greens
 
M: Um, Google, what on earth is rutabaga?
Google: It’s swede, and fresno pepper is just chilli.
M: Thanks Googs, I just need to pop out and buy some gruyere, and, er, swede.
/some time elapses/
M: I’m back! What’s next, Watson?
W:
Preheat oven to 450 fahrenheit.
Whisk garlic oil, vinegar, and fresno pepper in small bowl to blend.
Season dressing generously with salt and pepper.
Transfer 1/4 cup dressing to large resealable plastic bag.
Add bratwurst and turn to coat.
Let marinate 10 minutes.
Place bratwurst, skin side up and still coated with marinade, onto rimmed baking sheet.
Roast about 25 minutes.
Meanwhile, combine salad greens, rutabaga, and gruyere in large bowl.
Mix in all but 2 tablespoons of remaining dressing.
Divide salad among 4 plates.
Cut bratwurst off bone.
Slice bratwurst crosswise on slight diagonal.
Overlap bratwurst slices atop each salad.
Sprinkle with salt and pepper.
Drizzle with 2 tablespoons dressing and serve.
 
M: OK, so, Google again, what’s 450 in proper measurements?
W: Very funny
G: 232°c
M: Thanks, and can I use an actual cup to measure a cup?
G: Er, not exactly, here is a list of conversions for you…
M: OK, Google, thank you. So far so good, but Watson, you’re killing my brain with maths.
W: Math.
M: Maths. Anyway, it’s all going pretty well, now time to… slice… sausage… off… bone..?
W: I’ve never actually seen a sausage before.
M: Ok fair enough. I’ll just slice the sausage up into bits, shall I?
W: Seems like a good idea. 
M: Alright, Watson, our first cook is done! I’m really excited.
W: What does it taste like?
M: It’s nice. Not sure it needs uncooked swede, but it’s basically a warm, sausage salad, which is nice. Maybe par boiling the swede would work better? Something to try next time.
G: Can I have some?
M: No, Google, you’re a phone.